Tuesday, May 06, 2008

I'm so happy for you!


Every so often, I go online to check out what has been going on in the lives of people I know. Quite often, they disappear from the radar and the Internet is the only way to know if they're still alive.

When the name of an asshole is typed in the Google search engine, I wait for the results to appear. If the number of hits is low, a smile comes across my face. Not many. That’s good. While perusing through the links, I notice that they haven’t done anything, or have had much success.

Unless they have.

Then, I get pissed, especially when they don't deserve to be successful.

A few of the links have contact information. Maybe I'll be polite and send them a note and congratulate them on their success. But, fuck politeness. I know what these people did to get where they are. They have no empathy, no affect. They managed to do stab others in the back without breaking a sweat.

Although the big thing to do is to put aside any unresolved feelings of bitterness due to their littleness, that won't happen. I can't fake sincerity. You can practically see sparks being produced when my teeth are clenched into something resembling a smile.

They won't receive a note saying I'm so happy for you! from me, because I'm really not.

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