I decided not to work at the office today. I was stranded, thanks to the typhoon and oh-so gloomy weather. I love it. Working from home. I don't have to be logged in the office's network, no annoying phone calls, and I won't see the people that I really don't want to see. I just hope that I have a faster internet connection to watch YouTube videos, download MP3s and the occasional porn. Ha!
Right now, I'm actually on a "retreat." Not spiritual type of retreat where all you do is pray. I'm actually trying to understand where my life is right now. Family, Friends, Career and What-ifs. At one point, I realize that I try to please everyone first before I please myself. I'm arrogant, I'm an a-hole, I'm sarcastic. But at the end of the day, I have to please the people around me. I just want to give them what they want.
I need to change my life's philosophy. Need to work on my own happiness first. I asked some advice from R* a couple of weeks ago, also emailed XO, and had a quick chat with RC. This time, I was seeking advice. In the next couple of months, things will change. You may not like it, but I do. I hope I do.
Live life like there's no tomorrow. Carpe Diem. But of course, this should be done with some caution. I need to stop overanalyzing things in my head. I need to be ME. The guy who loves to have fun, who doesn't drink beer but can drink 8 glasses of margarita (with 2 limes please), the guy who loves to dance, the person who thinks that a little bit of silence is good, the employee who knows when to have a good sense of humor and when to draw the line of professionalism.
I am Dark and Twisty, I'm currently living my crappy life. I made my life crap and it's time to clean up my mess.
I'm ready to be me.